Sooner Rather Than Later
Feb 16, 2025 | by The Fellowship
“I never want to be a patient in a hospital again,” my 89-year-old husband told me a couple of months ago. For the last six months in 2024, hospitalizations and rehabs had been an all-too-frequent occurrence. It all started on July 1 when he fell and fractured a vertebra in his neck. The EMTs who answered our 911 call put him in a neck brace and took him to a hospital trauma center. One of the first things discovered was that he had a urinary tract infection (UTI) which most likely caused the dizziness that led to him falling.
That first hospital visit lasted 12 days, partly because Hurricane Beryl came roaring through during that period and caused many things to get put on hold. He went from the hospital to a rehabilitation facility. After a few days there, he suffered a urinary blockage and had to be re-hospitalized. When that was resolved, he was back in rehab. It was five weeks before he returned home. “I would have given up except that I knew you would be coming in the door every morning,” he said. “It was the only thing that kept me going.”
He came home with a catheter which is notorious for causing UTI’s. And it did, necessitating return trips to the ER. Prostate reduction surgery was done and its success thankfully meant getting rid of the catheter. For a few weeks, there were no UTI’s – but they eventually resurfaced. While pneumonia used to be the biggest cause of death in the elderly, now it is UTI’s. Part of the reason is these infections do not make themselves known in older people like they do in younger people with burning, discomfort and frequency of urination. With the elderly, it often does not show up until there is disorientation, dizziness or talking out of the head. By then, it is full blown!
My husband also has congestive heart failure. He was diagnosed with it several years ago. Initially, the symptoms centered around swelling in the legs and feet (edema) as the heart gradually weakens and cannot get rid of extra fluid in the body. We cut down drastically on salt, he began wearing compression stockings, and I massaged his feet and legs every night. As it very slowly progressed, he has developed some breathing problems. About a month ago, not only were the breathing problems more pronounced, he also told me about seeing things in the room that could not possibly be there. That was a big clue to another UTI. For my husband, UTI’s also always show up with talking in his sleep – which happened that night.
We had a heart-to-heart talk about calling in Hospice since he did not want to be hospitalized again and prayed for the Lord’s guidance. My husband chose Hospice and I called our primary care physician. When he heard the symptoms, the doctor immediately put in the order. Hospice has to be ordered by a physician who feel a patient’s symptoms indicate six months or less to live. If the patient improves significantly, that person can go out of Hospice until it is indicated again.
Asking for Hospice was one of the best decisions we have ever made! I thought Hospice was only for those on the verge of death, but that is a big misconception. Hospice has released so much stress for me as my husband’s caregiver and given me incredible peace of mind!
That very afternoon two ladies came from Hospice to help us. One handled the administrative aspects of getting him enrolled and the other was a nurse who evaluated his condition and immediately ordered oxygen and some medications to make him more comfortable. Equipment, like a hospital bed and oxygen machine, was delivered and installed within a couple of hours. Supplies, like wipes, pullups, pads and gloves, also arrived at our door followed by several medications. Hospice is funded by the government without any cost to us for the service.
One of the things that means the most to me is a 24-hour line to a nurse to get medical questions answered and emergency help if needed. An aide comes to bathe him and help with getting dressed. We have a nurse who visits frequently and interfaces with a geriatric doctor about my husband’s medical needs. Our nurse is so dedicated and tuned into his needs that we call her our “angel.” For instance, because he has so improved with constant oxygen, last week she ordered a portable oxygen apparatus that he can wear over his shoulder like a handbag. As a result we have gone out to lunch twice. What a blessing after he had been homebound for several weeks!
Some of the circumstances that can indicate readiness for Hospice are increased visits to the ER or hospitalizations, increased falls, decreased mobility, more than three infections during the past year, increased weight loss, decreased appetite, etc.
When the Lord led us to Hospice, I had no idea how greatly it would benefit my husband -- and myself as his caregiver. I am beyond grateful for the relief. My only regret is that we did not do it sooner!
And God is able to make all grace abound to you,
so that having all sufficiency in all things at all times,
you may abound in every good work.
2 Corinthians 9:8